Kenny attempted suicide again yesterday morning.
He is angry because we found him and took him to the hospital. He is very angry because he failed.
He told us he couldn't even get killing himself right. He told us we had two perfect sons that had girlfriends, jobs and both went to college; we didn't need him.
He called one of the nurses that gave him one on one phenomenal care a "fat, f---ing, bitch, lesbian. He said he was going to come home and get it right next time. She told him she was sorry he had to wake up where he didn't want too, but while he was in her care he would be safe. Then she turned to us and said you know he will do this again and one day might succeed.
We told her we knew. Just like... oh yay we're ready, we're prepared, what will be will be, life goes on with or without him. THAT'S A LOAD OF CRAP!
I want Kenny here! I want him to be happy! I want him to find a job that he at least likes! I want him to find love!
DAMN IT! DAMN IT! DAMN IT!